Life has a way of testing us in ways we never see coming. But what if the struggles we face aren’t meant to break us—but to build us? The phrase “grow through what you go through” isn’t just an empty mantra; it’s a mindset shift that transforms pain into power, adversity into wisdom, and setbacks into stepping stones.
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How I Grew Through It
I remember a time when I felt completely lost. A heartbreak I never saw coming, a business setback that shook my confidence, and an overwhelming feeling of failure that whispered I wasn’t enough. I questioned everything—my purpose, my resilience, my ability to trust again.
I didn’t want to hear that pain had a purpose. I wanted relief. But somewhere in the middle of the mess, I realized that healing wasn’t about forgetting—it was about growing through it. I stopped running from the lesson and leaned into it. That’s when things began to change.
Healing came in unexpected ways—through deep conversations, moments of raw honesty with myself, and even through guided questions in The Icebreakers and Beyond Dating card decks. Those questions forced me to reflect, confront my truth, and redefine my approach to love and relationships.
What Does “Grow Through What You Go Through” Mean?
At its core, this phrase means that every challenge carries an opportunity for growth. Instead of simply enduring hardship, we should actively learn, heal, and evolve through it.
The Bible reinforces this in James 1:2-4:
“Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.”
Struggles are not punishments. They are opportunities to refine our character, deepen our faith, and prepare us for something greater.
Who Said “Grow Through What You Go Through”?
This phrase has been widely used in self-development circles, but its exact origin is unclear. Some credit it to motivational speakers, while others associate it with the themes of resilience found in the Bible. What matters most is its timeless wisdom—because no one escapes hardship, but we all choose how we respond to it.

Grow Through What You Go Through Bible Verses
The Bible is rich with wisdom on how struggles refine us. Here are a few verses that align with this mindset:
- Romans 5:3-5 – “We glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.”
- 2 Corinthians 4:17 – “For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all.”
- Philippians 1:6 – “Being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”
Each of these verses reminds us that hardship isn’t the end of our story—it’s part of our growth process.
10 Inspiring “Grow Through What You Go Through” Quotes
Words have power, and these quotes from relationship experts and self-development leaders capture the essence of growth through adversity:
- “Your relationship with yourself sets the tone for every other relationship you have.” – Robert Holden (Source)
- “The pain you feel today is the strength you feel tomorrow.” – Unknown
- “Embracing discomfort is the birthplace of growth.” – Nedra Glover Tawwab
- “Every challenge you overcome shapes who you are becoming.” – Esther Perel
- “Healing doesn’t mean the damage never existed. It means the damage no longer controls your life.” – Akshay Dubey
- “Growth is painful. Change is painful. But nothing is as painful as staying stuck somewhere you don’t belong.” – Mandy Hale (Source)
- “Let your scars be proof that you fought for something better.” – Trent Shelton
- “Vulnerability is not winning or losing; it’s having the courage to show up and be seen when we have no control over the outcome. Vulnerability is not weakness; it’s our greatest measure of courage.” – Brené Brown (Source)
- “Heartbreak can be a catalyst for transformation.” – John Gottman
- “Every relationship is a mirror, reflecting the parts of ourselves we most need to heal.” – Lisa Firestone
Books That Help You Grow Through It
For those seeking deeper transformation, here are a few books that explore resilience, growth, and healing:
📖 Grow Through What You Go Through by Sandra L. Kearse-Stockton
📖 How to Grow Through What You Go Through by Jodie Cariss
📖 Becoming the One by Sheleana Aiyana
📖 Set Boundaries, Find Peace by Nedra Glover Tawwab
Each of these books provides tools for healing, self-awareness, and personal growth.
Becoming Stronger Through Life’s Challenges
Growth isn’t about waiting for wounds to disappear—it’s about learning from them. When we shift our perspective and embrace struggles as part of our journey, we gain wisdom, resilience, and a deeper connection to ourselves and others.
If you’re navigating a difficult season, lean into it. Reflect, ask the hard questions, and seek deeper understanding. And if you need a tool to guide those conversations, my dating & relationship card games are designed to help you grow through it.
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